1. Have Fun! Sometimes it just gets too serious. It doesn't need to be constant stress even if we are here in the Bay Area. So, Stop. And every now and again... Remind each other how much you love each other and... have some fun!

2. Immediately after the ceremony most couples have their formal pictures taken. It is important to allow adequate time for this, so that you don't start running behind before you arrive at your reception. The suggestion is to plan 3-4 minutes for each person in the bridal party, include parents and grandparents.

3. For example, let say that you have a maid-of-honor, a best man, two bridesmaids, two groomsmen, a flower girl, four parents, two grandparents and yourselves, a total of fifteen people. Allow for 45 minutes to an hour for your formal pictures. Another possible alternative is to take all or the majority of the formal pictures before the wedding starts (and guests arrive)

4. If you feel that you will be arriving at the reception more than half an hour after your guests arrive, consider letting your guests begin eating (at least hors d'ouevres) as they get there. Guests have a tendency to become anxious if they are waiting longer than 15 minutes (this is Silicon Valley, after all.) Also, if you arrive at the reception after your bridal party, only have yourselves announced into the reception because it'll probably be difficult to round-up your attendants, once they have started to mingle.

5. Receiving lines can take a lot of time, speaking to 100 guests for just 20 seconds adds up to over half an hour. Go eat! If you must have a receiving line, have only yourselves (and possibly your parents) form your receiving line. But consider a Grand Entrance! After, you can always go from table to table the two of you together (have your photographer in tow) to talk to each of your guests. These make great photos! And each guest feels special that you came by.

6. If possible, do your first dance after your guests have eaten. This way your guests will be ready to fill the dance floor after your traditional dances. Speaking of traditional dances: brides, locate your father before your first dance, for a smooth transition, and remind your bridal party to be ready to dance with their partners when it's their turn.

   

7. Remember to place your wedding cake away from the traffic flow and out of direct sunlight. Cutting your wedding cake is one of the highlights of the reception, have it announced for your guests to enjoy. Be sure the photographer and videographer are ready. Nothing's worse than having someone change film, tape or memory cards right at the wrong moment. Have your DJ get everybody ready before he announces it.

8. When it comes to deciding on your first dance, father/daughter dance etc. test them once, to make sure that your choices are at comfortable tempos. This will avoid having to stumble through your first dance. Consider having dance lessons if you're not comfortable on the dance floor. Several lessons with a ballroom dance instructor will do wonders! Click here for the place I go to.

9. Musical entertainment may be a critical part of the success of your reception (bridal surveys after their wedding show that most brides wish they had spent proportionately more of their budget of time and money on their DJ.) Typically, about 20% of your invited guests will be your close friends, leaving 80% of your guests older or younger relatives, co-workers, and friends of the families. Be considerate of all your guests. Keep this in mind when making your musical requests, it's a way of letting your guests know that you appreciate them coming.

10. As the bride and groom, you are the center of attention, therefore you set the tone of the reception. When you dance - the dance floor will be full; when you sit and socialize - your guests will do the same.

11. Schedule your photographer and videographer to be on hand for all your special events. This will avoid having to rush through the cake cutting, bouquet toss, send off etc. because of time restraints. Make it clear in your contract how long you expect them to stay.

Hire highly experienced professionals.

There is no second chance for your wedding day. As you begin to plan for this day, you'll start to understand the scope of it (if you haven't already). Everything has to fit into place, it takes a lot of people's efforts, working together, to make your wedding day a success. Misfortunes such as poor photos, colors that don't match, uneven or lopsided cakes, helpers that have no clue, people not showing up, and equipment breakdowns are much more likely to occur when friends and family are used.

It seems to make sense when you're first thinking of it. You have a friend who wants to help and it will save money. But if in the middle of your once-in-a-lifetime wedding it is not happening the way you dreamed of it and you could wave a magic wand to make it right( believe me, you would do it. Then, you'd happily pay double or triple (any price) just to stop your new spouse from crying. But the only magic wand you have is to pay a little more to hire the best up front.

Here's a hint if you don't have an unlimited budget: make a list of everything you're going to have at your wedding and reception. Decide between yourselves how important each item is for the success of your event. Give it a percentage (you can only go up to 100% total.) Then divide up your budget in those percentages.

Look around the internet and see what brides and grooms have rated as important (after their weddings.) I'll bet that if you ask, most would rate photos and entertainment the highest in importance. And those categories are the ones that most brides and grooms hire last (when they are getting more concerned about their budget) or they are usually the categories where we know someone who wants to help.